10 Types Of Moms That Suck

Great blog that brings some laughter to the table. She certainly speaks her mind and (in my opinion) stated the things I was already thinking to myself.

Thought Catalog


I’m not sure if you knew, but I’m pretty much the best, most perfectest mom ever in the history of ever. I don’t need to tell you that’s sarcasm, right internet? Maybe? Eh. Is this satire now? I feel like I used to know what that was but I think I lost it somewhere along the way during my Wild Adventures in Blogging. People seem to have created this new, vague definition. Anyway, back to my perfection.

1. Language Police Mom

Firstly, that sounds like an awesome name for some sort of knockoff Barbie doll; you know the kind made of the same plastic they use for those KoolAid bottle-things that your cheap Aunt used to buy for you years after you’d stopped playing with dolls? Complete with police uniform, perfectly curled hair and a baby under each arm.  

Secondly, I appreciate…

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Far from perfect…

Recently, a few people have said I don’t know how you do it all. Well, after reading this article – http://www.huffingtonpost.com/katie-morford/12-confessions-to-dispel-the-myth-of-the-perfect-mother_b_5201421.html?utm_hp_ref=parents&ir=Parents – I figured I would share my few things that prove I’m not perfect. 

1. There are days when I don’t want to get my butt out of bed and hit snooze way too many times.
2. I’m sometimes too lazy to take the laundry out of the dryer so I just “fluff it” a few times until I finally get the energy to do it. Case in point, if Matt checks the dryer right now Luke’s clothes are in there from last night.
3. I stole from Luke’s Easter basket…only the jelly beans though. Matt got the chocolate. Okay maybe that’s a lie…I may have had a few piece of the chocolate.
4. After 5 years with Matt, he is still shocked by the amount of food that I can consume. For instance, I ate half a pizza, sweet potatoes, chips, graham crackers, and more junk after my half marathon.
5. I have my “fat days” and this happens more than I care to admit.
6. We cannot buy fruit snack any more. Because I will consume the entire box.
7. I will buy two half gallons of Turkey Hill ice cream, one for me and one for Matt. On more than one occasion Matt has only gotten one bowl of ice cream, the rest was consumed by yours truly.
8. Half the time I’m not organized and will run a little behind in the morning (because I hit snooze too many times or) that I haven’t prepped my lunch for the day.
9. I eat too much.
10. I have let Luke sleep on his stomach, among other things you aren’t supposed to let your children do. 

And that’s just the first 10 that came to mind…

I’m in my car 4 hours a day and when I get home I can finally relax. It’s great and sometimes I’m lazy. Oh and well I eat too much. I should have more motivation to work out early in the morning or should be cleaning the house. But guess what…I’m more worried about having a happy son and husband.